Pages of growth - A journal of notes

We often think of listening as something we do for others. But over time, I have learned - some of the most important listening we'll ever do .... is inward. Not to noise. Not to opinions. But to the soft, steady voice within us. The one we often silence in the rush of the day. There is a difference between hearing and listening.  Hearing happens by default. But listening? That's intentional. It's active. It's sacred. I have learned to listen.... To the tiredness behind my forced smile.  To the quiet joy in the simplest of routines. To the uneasiness I feel when something isn't right - even if everything looks fine on the outside. I am learning to listen.... To my body when it says "Rest." To my heart when it says "Not this." To my spirit when iit says, " You're enough." In prayer, I now speak less, I listen more. Not waiting for a loud answer - but for the calm, the shift, the clarity that follows when I finally stop trying to fix,...

Some truths dont arrive faster like lightning.  They arrive quietly. They arrive again and again - untill the moment one is ready to listen. I had always wanted to be that her, the one who handles both home and career. It was a dream that I carried in me seeing a few of my teachers, friend’s moms and a few other working woman.  Life gives what is destined. For a few they get what they desire and a few had to accept what comes to them.  I had always thought of myself to be a person who has the ability to juggle things effortlessly and climb up the ladder even if I get tired. I tried hard. I tried really hard. To get into that or rather to start climbing the ladder, I equipped myself with all the academics and courses that is needed for the first step to become “The Successful Woman”. - which was my dream. But I had to get down from the first step itself rather than climbing up the ladder. I dreamed to start again once everything is settled, once kids grow up, once my perso...

Not all prayers are said with folded hands. Some are whispered in silence, some are cried into pillows, some are felt as a deep ache in the chest. And some - never spoken at all - just rise quietly from heart, hoping the universe understands. Over the years my idea of prayers have changed. As a child, I thought prayer means, asking for good and high marks. Slowly it became the prayers for good things to happen. Prayers to keep the people I loved safe.  I used to recite them with perfect words, at the perfect time, as if they were instructions in a text book.  But life taught me otherwise.  Now I pray when I wash my dishes or when I do other house hold chores in silence.  I pray when I watch my child sleep peacefully. I pray not just to ask - but to thank, to surrender, to breathe. Some prayers are for strength.  Some are for clarity. Some are just a quiet "please" when the road feels too uncertain. And sometimes.... prayers go unanswered - or so it seems. But in...

We go to the beach early in the morning to watch Sunrise. We watched the sunrise in Marina, in Kanyakumari and in Andamans. Breath taking, dramatic and full of vibes. A few visuals in each place is etched in my mind.  But that morning, it was just another one, I did not expect any magical things or any dramatic moments to happen. Waking up to yet another day full of chores I realised I have woken up earlier than usual. The whole house is silent so is the outside with just the sound of the horns of vehicles in the distant road.  As it dawned upon me that it had been a long time since, I have had my coffee in our balcony where I have my favourite seat. With the aroma of filter coffee filling up the room along with the smell of the flowers from the garden, I sat in the seat and placed the davara tumbler next to me. (Coffee should be had in davara tumbler only not in a cup).  With a relaxed mood I took deep breaths and started looking at the distant sky. The once dark sky sud...

  Forgiveness sets you free. Memory keeps you wise. There is an old saying that goes, “Forgive and Forget”. But life teaches us something different. Forgive - yes. But never forget what it taught you. Forgiveness is an internal release. It’s the act of unhooking yourself from. The weight of resentment. When you forgive, you are not saying what happenned was Okay but you are saying to yourself. And to others that “You are choosing peace over poison”. But forgetting? That is a different story….. Because every painful moment, every betrayal, every disappointment - carries a hidden lesson. Sometimes its is about boundaries. Sometimes it is about trusting your gut feeling. And often, it is about learning who truly needs and deserves your energy. If you forget what actually happened and how you felt at that moment, you might heal - but the chance and risk of repeating the same mistake is high. If you remember, you carry forward the wisdom.  Forgiveness is a wisdom, and Memory acts a...

 We have all heard the saying, “Early to bed and early to rise keeps a person healthy wealthy and wise”. Though it sounds old fashioned, its wisdom still rings true - perhaps now more than ever. In a world that runs and keeps running 24/7 where night often blends into early mornings and sleep at times becomes optional, the idea of a structured routine feels  both simple and revolutionary. But there is definitely a reason this age - old habit has been praised for generations. 1. Health Starts with Rest: Sleep is just not rest or relaxation - it is restoration. Our bodies repair, detox and heal when we sleep. Getting to bed allows our body clock. To sync with the nature’s rhythm, which in turn helps improve. The sleep quality, immunity, digestion, and even mental clarity. Waking up early with sun rise and enerrgising ourselves with sunlight boosts mood-regulating hormones and helps set a positive tone for the day. 2. Wealth of Time and Mind: Rising early gives us the gift of tim...

 The saying or proverb “ Early to Bed and Early to Rise keeps a Person Healthy Wealthy and Wise ” is often attributed to Benjamin Franklin . Though similar statements existed even before his time, after he rendering it, it became more famous and more powerful. A simple reminder to every one of the benefits of maintaining a disciplined and structured routine. What does it actually means or it says: * Healthy: Going to bed early and waking up early usually aligns with the body’s natural circadian rhythm, which supports better sleep, improved immunity, and overall well-being. * Wealthy:  Waking up early gives a heal start on the day, allowing time for planning, productivity and uninterrupted focus, which can lead to better financial and careeer outcomes over time. * Wise: Early risers often  have more time for learning, reading, reflecting, or meditating - habits that sharpen the mind and enrich it and encourage better decision making too.

This post is one of my self reflections. Not every turning point begins with fun and fireworks. Sometimes, it starts quietly - with a broken plan and a silent room. I had always dreamed of becoming a famous content creator especially in the field of writing. About 20 years ago, when it was the beginning of online content creation opportunities I applied for a position in a company. I believed that I was personally alligned with that role. I made it to the final round of interview and I was quite sure that I have made it and I will defenitely get the job.  People around me friends and family kept assuring me that I will get this job for sure and I started dreaming and picturing around that job and title and future.  And ...... nothing happenned. It was all still and silent. No calls. No letter. No mails. Nothing. Silence and a loud silence.  I started shattering inside though I kept checking my mails on an hourly basis. When there was nothing, my brain started overthinking...

 We often associate confidence with having -  Having control. Having answers.  Having achievements to point to.  But life, in its quiet wisdon, has shown me again and again. Real confidence is born not from holding on, but from letting go.  Letting go actually sounds simple.But it rarely is,  Letting go of people we once trusted. Letting go of a version of ourselves we outgrew. Letting go of expectations that weighed us down. Letting go of the need to always be right, liked, or understod. Letting go of “shoulds” - what we should have done by now, what we should have become. At first, it feels like a loss. Because for so long, we have believed out worth lies in clinging - to roles, to identities, to relationships,  to appearances of perfection. But somewhere along the journey, something shifts. You start to realise that letting go doesn’t mean you are giving up, It means you are choosing yourself. It means, you are clearing space - not just in your life...

     Because growth isn’t always about effort - sometimes it’s about the soil too. No matter how talented, passionate, or hardworking you are, being in the wrong environment canslowly chip away at your sense of self - worth. I say this not just from observation but from experience. I’ve sat in rooms where I gave my best - and still felt invisible.i’ve been part of spaces where my ideas were met with silence, my effort with indifference, and my passion with polite dismissal. And slowly, it began to show - not on the outside, but deep within.  The Slow Shrinking Environments don’t just shape how others see you - they shape how you begin to see yourself.  When you are surrounded by constant criticism, emotional neglect, or people who only see a version of you they can manage, you begin to second-guess yourself. You start dimming your light so it doesn’t bother any one. You quiet your voice - not because you have lost it, but because no one is listening. Over time, ...

It wasn't a long talk but just one of the casual chat with my mom one evening while having a cup of hot coffee.  It was a tiring day and I was venting out to her about the new project, new learning and all the stress that I am in which is all too much for me to take. She was listening to my vent quietly as ever. But then on this particular day after my vent she said quietly,             "Its ok. You are allowed to be tired.                But never mistake or confuse your                 tiredness for failure." Thus saying, she walked inside the kitchen with the two empty cups.  I was sitting in the table silently without responding right away. Because, that sentence clung to me. Her words made me realize, I was using a wrong scale to measure myself. Productivity over Peace.  That one simple line taught me to step back, breathe, and not to be so cruel on myse...

Letting go doesn't have to be loud or cruel. It can be quiet an act of self - respect. Not all endings require a drama. A few or some requires and deserves grace. If you are ready to let go of something, be it a habit, relationshi, a belief or even a version of yourself - you don't have to break a mountain or burn a bridge to walk away. Here's how you can let go silently and kindly too: 1. Be honest with yourself first                 Clarity is the first kindness. Before explaining to anyone else, acknowledge the facts and truth to yourself. Ask yourself - Why am I holding on to it? Is it fear, love, habit or guilt? 2. You dont need a grand exit                   You definitely dont owe anyone a detailed good bye. Sometimes, the kindest thing is a gentle retreat - less contact, more space, no resentment. 3. Stop trying to be THE version they prefer               ...

Letting go isn't the end. Sometimes, most times, it is the kindest beginning.  It was a regular day, I think a wednesday, mid of a week, when I suddenly realized something, that I have been ignoring or avoiding for months. It struck, that I was no longer myself around her. Around her? Yes her my friend for years. What all we shared? Literally everything. Food, secrects, joy, grief, jokes that we found funny and what not. She was that friend, who knew how I like my tea, what I would order at any restaurant or where I would like to eat. That kind of friend I thought and had imagined to be around, would be with me, will stand next to me in every important moment of my life.  But lately, our calls had become shorter, awkward. Whenever we met, especially in the recent times, it feel like I was performing: choosing my words very carefully, tiptoeing around topics, laughing at things that didn't feel funny.  And, I noticed something I couldn't unsee - I always left those convers...

There are a few lot of things that don't break us, but they just ask us to be released.  There is a certain heaviness we carry -  Not because we have to but because we don't to how to put it down or how to let it go.  For me, it was a friendship that I held on to too tightly. It had once brought joy. Laughter. Comfort. But over a period of time, it started feeling like walking on eggshells, I felt that I am being responsible for soneone else's happiness while neglecting my own.  Still, I clung to it. Because letting go felt like a failure. It felt like giving up on something that meant the world once. Until one day, I realized: I wasn't holding on out of love anymore. I was holding on out of fear - of being wrong, of being alone, of what others might think. And thats when I learnt what letting go actually means.  Letting go isn't always dramatic. It's not a slammed door or a final message. Sometimes, its just waking up and choosing peace over pressure.  Som...

Sometimes it is not a breakthrough, its not a speech or an achievement. It's just a single, quiet moment - like watching my kid fill the water bottle for school or tie the shoe lace without asking for help. I stood there holding my breath. And in that silence a sudden wave struck me quiet hard, my kid doesnot need me the same way as before though they need me forever. No, it was not saddness. It was a shift- a soft shift - the turning of a page to a new chapter. That very moment made me realize growth is not always loud or obviously visible. Many times, it happens in the background. It happens softly may be that is why we fail to notice.  No I wont say we fail, rather we are too busy to notice. And the real BIG lesson? Letting go can be quiet too. But no less powerful. 

An introduction to a 5 part series on unexpected moments of personal growth. Some lessons don’t come wrapped in big boxes. They don’t arrive with applause or even announcing about it. They don’t arrive with turning points but instead, they show up quite softly - in a glance, in silence, in something unsaid. This series is a reflection on those momeents. The ones we often overlook. The ones that arrive like whispers but stay strong inside us like anchors. I will share 5 moments of reflections that taught me more than a classroom or a textbook or a motivational speech. Moments like:        * A quite pause where something small shifted me        * A conversation that stayed long after it ended        * A setback that turned out to be my best teacher         * A sunrise that reminded me its ok to slow down         * A truth I resisted untill it finally set me free These aren't dramatic l...

 Real reflections. Gentle reminders. Everyday lessons. Life teaches us something new every moment but not in a loud voice. Sometime, no most of the times, it speaks through quiet moments - a conversation, a setback, a sunrise or even a truth we resisted. Over a period of time, these moments, form a pattern and that pattern is growth.  And this blog is where I gather all those small pieces of lessons. These are somethings I wish I'd learned sooner - A lesson that gently nudged me, changed me and moulding me. Each post in this blog is a note to self - a reminder, a reflection or a realization from my journey. These are not advices, these are written as an expert or as an authority of the subject, but are written by a person - me, who is still learning and sharing it out loud, hoping it resonates with you too. Think of this space as a grown-up's journal- not one of perfection, but of presence. A space for asking better questions, becoming softer and stronger and moving through li...

 Every other day, every other moment we learn somehing new and we keep growing. There is never a stop to the process of learning. This blog is a collection of reflective and honest thoughts from the lessons  leart and still learning. They are not preachings or advices but rather lessons and hacks that helped me and still helping me grow.